avalononline | text; un: credo

I am a sinner that avoided punishment in my world.

I thought to hide this fact and in fact, I tried to at first, but then there would be no point to have written this message at all. It only shows that I'm more of a coward than even what I had believed myself to be.

[Okay, this is getting a bit more heavy and personal.]

What is it that you did? Some sins that do happen sometimes aren't worthy of punishment. The others can be worked upon.

I do not know You personally, but the fact that you are taking a stand and facing this, acknowledging the fails and mistakes, cannot make you a complete coward.

[ How about that? He went from being incredibly closed off to being like, 'So, hey, might be a sinner and coward and also here's some other laundry to share.' ]

You think too well of me to believe that they are something that are not worthy of punishment or worked upon.

Innocent lives were destroyed, hundreds ended up losing their belief in salvation, and those I most wanted to protect ended up having to carry the brunt of all those consequences.

I became an angel to be a righteous sword and shield, but ended up using all my power only for evil.

[ Sure, some of that is just drinking a lot of cult koolaid, but he refuses to say that because he was manipulated doesn't mean that he holds no responsibility. In fact, he should hold ALL the responsibility for not realizing it was koolaid in the first place!! ]

[Small steps, one at a time.]

I was raised and trained to be a Royal Advisor. Not letting people fall into depression because of their actions is somewhat in my job description.

If you were only to focus on the bad things you did, you will never be able to raise your head and deal with things that come after, things that you can fix. Every coin has two sides.

I know a man that is in a similar position as you; he acquired power so he could command armies of soldiers that are effectively ours and his enemies. For the goal of protecting his sister. But when the time came, he knew what he had to do with it.

You could channel what you gathered towards the right goal. You seem aware of your actions. It might not redeem you immediately, but with the knowledge and help, you will be able to handle it.

Edited 2020-12-14 14:51 (UTC)

[ It's NERF or nothing! ]

Is that so?

[ GOSH THAT SOUNDS A LITTLE TOO FAMILIAR AND CREDO IS DYING INSIDE. But hey, maybe it didn't end terribly for that person. ]

Was he able to do it? Was he able to protect his sister?

And I don't deserve redemption. I don't deserve to be unburdened for my sins. What good I do is done without any hope of peace for myself. If I wanted peace, I should have done good to start rather than ignore the signs that I was no longer following in the true gospel of the Savior.

[TOUGH LUCK MAN. Ignis doesn't know details but he knows for sure that Lunafreya died.]

He had managed to protect her from enemy forces, yes, for many years. In a drastic way, yes, but no harm befell her from the enemy commanders. However, her duty was to the Astrals and the true King. As such, she was using her energy to summon the Astrals so that our King can prove himself to them and get their blessing to banish the plague and darkness

[Ignis is very peeved as he writes this because FUCK THOSE GUYS, I know what they are up to.]

As such, her life force drained away. The Usurper. the carrier of the plague, killed her at the altar. But even if he didn't do it, she didn't have
a lot of time remaining.

If that is what you think is the best for you, I cannot argue against it. After all, I just met you, so I am not the right person to say what You should do. I just want to point out that your journey has not yet ended and there are a lot of things you can still do, things that you wronged that You can attempt to right.

That is quite the sacred duty.

[ Even if he doesn't know about what Astrals are, he can at least infer that they are some sort of holy being. ]

I see. That is most unfortunate for her.

No. Putting it like that is putting it too lightly, I think. To say something is unfortunate is too easy a thing to say. She shouldn't have had to suffer.

[ He has some feelings as someone who also does extremes for his sister. ]

[ Credo decides to not mention that he has died in his own world. He feels like that is spitting in the face of someone's goodwill. The person has shared much with him, and deserves more respect than a statement that is little more than a "last word" to an argument that is not even an argument between them. ]

Why do you have so much faith in a person that you do not know?

Edited 2020-12-14 20:03 (UTC)

[They are, and they were being that he didn't question until he got a revelation, a vision from Oracle's familiar. He's still trying to come to terms with that; his faith doesn't lie with Astrals anymore, but with his King, only.]

It is, and she had seen her duty through. Fate, however, doesn't let her rest. She is one of the people from my world brought here after her death. Perhaps a talk with her can help you ease your mind about the events you went through. She's an oracle and people's healer, a kind soul. I am sure she will be willing to listen- she is connected more to the divinities than myself.

And it is true; I wish she didn't have to suffer. Her brother and I arrived at that place minutes after she perished.

[Which resulted in Ravus getting enraged and almost doing something completely stupid.]

Because a person with true malice in their hearts don't stand and look and what they have done. They don't contemplate or wonder how it affects other people. When trying times come, we all do what we think is the best course of action. And from our talk, I have a feeling it applies to you as well.

I am Ignis. Ignis Scientia.

[Yeah, he forgot to introduce himself. His username is a bit of a giveaway but still.]

So, she was given another chance to live? [ THEY SHOULD START A CLUB. ] It would be unkind of me to burden her with these worries when she has done so much already. But thank you for the suggestion.

[ But hey -- guess he'll watch over her if he happens to meet her. He'll just keep all his emotions inside (when he isn't on the network) and one day, HE'LL DIE. AGAIN. ]

However, I will watch out for her. She should be able to live comfortably and well now that she is outside of fate's cruel influence. [ NOT HIM THO. CREDO TO CREDO: I CAN JUST CHOKE, HOWEVER ]

Edited 2020-12-15 04:52 (UTC)

[ Credo isn't sure how to take those words. He wants to offer a 'thank you' but that sounds too hollow and empty. ]

I don't know if I'm deserving of such an analysis, but I suppose that we shall see.

[ THE MOST HE CAN OFFER ]

I am Credo.

[ AWKWARD ]

It would seem we both had the same idea of how to make our usernames. [ NICE TO MEET YOU ]

I wonder if it is another chance to live or if it is just prolonging her suffering. I do not know if she is still plagued by the pains of having her life force drained away from her. Of course, I am happy to see her alive, but it makes me wonder what will happen later.

Thank you for your offer and help. I am sure she will appreciate it too. She has healing abilities here, so you can seek her out if you are injured.

[He's usually not wrong with his assessments, but he's also polite and won't push it.]

I feel no need to come up with some ridiculous names. [He has appearances to keep! Prompto did nag him to change it and he did contemplate to go for "CoffeeAndSpice" (his two favorite things) but it sounded too unprofessional to him.]

You mean that you will have to watch her die once more? This is Avalon. It may be that when the time comes, she could choose to stay within this realm and never have to experience death, again. A small hope, and perhaps a cruel comfort to give, but I offer it all the same.

Of course -- thank you.

I also feel there's no need to come up with anything too outlandish. How could anyone know that it is me? Why not simply use one's name to identify oneself? [ New-fangled Internet. He hates it. ]

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SOMETIMES I THINK I'M FUNNY

I wheezed ahah XDD

:D!!