1st Rewrite [Text - UN: koko1010]

[scriptwriter]

So doom and gloom aside... I believe that there's a big problem that needs to be addressed here!

Why isn't anyone talking about the awesome gacha games on this smartphone!?

Warrior Stickman. Dragon Odyssey. Blood Empire. Strike Knights. There's so many mobile games around here and I see everyone is just sleeping on them! Do none of these ring a bell?! Have you all lost of your sense of romanticism and adventure!? We just had a tournament with Mario Party for crying out loud! Surely this has tickled your interests in video games a little bit!

For those who don't know... Gacha gaming is the ultimate pass time where you can play video games on your little smartphone here. Pretty self-explanatory, right? But be warn that if you decide to step into the world of gacha... It's a incredible hell that you're walking into. An all-or-nothing bloodbath where the strong live and the weak die. A path of carnage and broken dreams where 1-Star characters are devoured and forgotten by the irresistible 5-Star characters.

In a sense... Our society is no different from a gacha game, no? The strong and beautiful who live in high society are considered the 5-Star characters and we who have been drinking from the gutters and crawling through mud are the mere 1-Stars! But fear not 1-Stars... I, Tennouji Kotarou, the man who rules over common sense, am here to bestow my knowledge upon you! As the chosen "Common Sense Archon" it is my duty to pass on my fruits of wisdom!

So if you'd want a place to start, I can suggest that you play "Glory Kingdom"! It's one that I'm pretty into lately. Ever dreamed of befriending a cute goddess? Ever wanted to build your kingdom from the neck up? Ever wanted to team-up with a crazy tyrant babe who hates your guts, then slowly falls in love with you as you show her the joys of the normal world?!

Then this game is absolutely for you! They're even giving away free gems for new players who join, so what are you waiting for? Don't be a 1-Star, be a ★COOL STAR★ and join in the big sensation sweeping the island nation!

P.S: I was not paid to do this (though I will accept donations since I'm a little low on cash right now from my valuable gacha gaming research)! I simply want to share my joy involving a little hobby of mine! If you have any questions, I'll be more than happy to answer. Thank you. ♥

Comments

[ichoosefight]

not really a great choice, actually? it's a little... threatening.

maybe stick with asking how they're doing, or how long they've been in Avalon

[kokuryuu]

[In real life, the neighbors downstairs, an aging married couple, can hear a loud THUNK when Souma hits his head against the desk in chagrin at himself.

Someday, they are probably going to call whatever Avalon has instead of cops on the weirdo who keeps intermittently yelling things at random times during the day when he uses the internet, like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH and WHAT DO I SAY NOW and GODDESS OF MERCY HELP ME and of coursse, the head bonking. And the pacing. The pacing is annoying as fuck.]

Oh gods.

I am terribly sorry, for, that was definitely NOT my intention. I have no experience with this kind of thing. My friend calls it smalltalking I think. Where I came from it's so different from how you all talk here about many things that are not work or war

If I may practice (you do not have to make an answer)

Good morrow, Steph-san. How are you doing this day?
Have you lived in Avalon for a long time?

[ichoosefight]

[ Good thing she can't hear shouting more than a floor away. The response makes her smile though. ]

It's alright, I know what you mean.

I'm doing well. I've been here about 3 months now.

What's the -san mean?

[kokuryuu]

It shows I respect you as a person. I think it's a habit of talking that's hard to let go of.

Is there anything you like about living here?

[ichoosefight]

That's sweet. Or normal I guess, if it's a habit.

I like hearing about other people's homes. Even if we're from similar worlds there are all sorts of different cultures here.