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So

If you have like

A phobia of some kind, especially to a particular kind of animal

How do you get over it?

[He has a reason for asking and it has all to do with the fact that he has had Nigou the pup since Kuroko went home but now there's a wolf in his house due to a certain blond basketball player staying over. Nigou was hard enough to try and get used to but he's also had like, a couple years in Seirin to do so. Add in Nova the wolf and all that dog-phobia is coming right back.

He's trying, okay?]

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It depends which animal. Is there a trauma attached to it?

Well yeah.

[Ugh, fine. He supposed he would have to explain when asking something like this.]

Got bit by a huge dog when I was a kid.

I had a feeling it might be a dog. I'd say begin dogs that have good depositions, large or small...don't be afraid to ask your friends for help to and that they are around when you do.

Phobias can be hard to conquer since they come from a deep fear in our soul, but I've found that it's easiest to slowly work at them a little each day, so that by the time a month or two has passed, you can really see your progress.

How the hell did you 'have a feeling' it'd be a dog???

Ugh, nvm

So basically just be around them more?

[He was kind of afraid of that, even if it was the most logical. If only because he more or less just had to get used to Nigou. Kuroko certainly didn't let him get away with running away all the time. But now there's Nova and...]

Yeah, well... my friend and his wolf is staying with me and I can't exactly kick them out right now.

Dogs and spiders are both very common phobias.

[She pauses to think about it.]

I think that's' the best way to do it...but don't be afraid to leave for a few hours if you get too uncomfortable.

If you have a friend with animal magic, you might ask them to turn into a dog for a bit if you want a more controlled experience too.

I thought it was snakes and spiders.

Whatever, I don't know anyone with animal magic. But... I guess I'll give it a go. Nigou's gonna get bigger sooner or later.

[He didn't know much about dogs for obvious reasons, but he was pretty sure Nigou's breed was one of those big fluffy types, a snow dog or something.]

[Hifumi is the last person in the universe to talk to people about how to get over phobias but it is also for this reason he wants to try and help this person. What if he can successfully help?! He would be so happy!]

Maybe have a friend help you get slowly acquainted with an animal like it!
Keep a distance at first and then decrease the amount of distance as time goes on!
But make sure your friend is someone who makes you feel super safe!

My friend basically forced me to be around his dog because he became our mascot. So I'm used to Nigou but... another animal is joining us and it's a lot bigger. Like, bigger than the one that bit me.

[So, he's got a dilemma on his hands, even if Kise insists Nova is friendly and, so far, the wolf has yet to actually show any signs of aggression at him.]

Hm that's a toughie!
You know what, maybe watch some videos of big dogs to start with!
Pet owners with big dogs that are super nice and cuddly!
Maybe it'll help a little seeing that they're not all dangerous!
And maybe make sure a friend is with you for that too if seeing them is scary for you!
And then the first thing I said!

Edited (words are hard) 2021-03-30 03:31 (UTC)

...I guess that could work.

[He didn't exactly get the same reaction seeing dogs on TV than in real life, but he did definitely prefer not the see them either. He may as well try.]

Have you tried...exposure therapy?

I. I use that for my phobia but I guess it really depends on how bad it is.

What's exposure therapy? Just... forcing myself around the animal until I get used to it or is there some kind of method I'm missing?

[Because if that's the case, he wants to kick Kuroko's ass even more now.]

Well...it's usually done in the company of a professional but essentially, yes, that's exactly it.

The goal is to do things that make you uncomfortable enough times that you...don't feel that way anymore. And what you do gets progressively harder. But it's also okay to have missteps and redo things previously done too.

It doesn't really help if you overdo it and push yourself too hard, you know?

Yeah.

I guess I was kinda already doing that with Nigou. He's our team mascot so I was forced to be around him.

[So, it got better over time, but he wasn't exactly someone who still liked dogs just because of one runt.]

Oh! I see. Well, that's a good start then! Maybe you could ask people who have...familiars that are similar to Nigou to help you out too?

Wait, what type of animal?

Honestly just spend time with them.

Dogs.

Yeah, that's the general gist I'm getting.

Dogs? They're pretty easy. Once you can figure out their body language, there's no reason to be worried about them. That means they an start to be predictable.

Dogs from your place aren't exactly the same on mine, okay? Dogs bite people all the time if they're not trained and that's exactly what happened with me.

My familiar is a dog. Their body language is similar, or basically the same. Tails wag when happy. If it's down, and still, it usually is submissive.

Everyone here has given really good advice already so I can't say I have a lot to add.

Don't pressure yourself too much to expect to be better in a certain amount of time. Go at your own pace.

Are you trying to get over this phobia for yourself, or someone else?

Both, I guess.

I could go without going near any dog for as long as I live, really. But since my team mascot is this little runt that Kuroko likes to shove in my face, I was kinda forced to get used to him. But I still...

Anyway, a friend is staying over who has a wolf and I don't want to kick him out. So, I wanted to see about getting used to him instead.

So it's a dog phobia, huh? Phobias of that sort where the source of the fear is a common place occurrence are, what I feel, both easier yet more difficult to deal with. You're sort of forced to confront it regularly unless you're actively avoiding it, like you mentioned that you don't have a problem with. I think the fact that it's something you'd like to conquer is a good start.

I'd imagine you've told this friend about your phobia but if not definitely bring it up, that way they can cooperate with you on getting used to the animal. It's going to be a lot of work, and it'll be stressful. Don't worry about needing to stop at any time, but also, once you start then decide on your commitment to how far you want to take things.

He knows about it. I just don't want to make him put his pet outside either.

[Even he knows Nova doesn't deserve that.]

I guess that makes sense. There's enough rooms in the house that I can take a break if I need to or ask for Nova to go in there for a bit, I guess.

If you live in a place with lots of rooms I think that can be implemented into helping with the phobia. Being in the same building is a good start, then steadily shorten the distance between the two of you. If you're aware the dog is nearby but can't actively see it that would be a good way to get yourself used to having it around.

( he's gonna have so many patients... )

Most of the time, we recommend something called exposure therapy. Though it's best to talk to a therapist on how to approach such a matter. After all, everyone's reasons for phobias are different, and sometimes a blended approach is an even better method for the individual patient.

If you like, I could see you for an initial appointment.

( and maybe some eventual cognitive magic if he figures out hypnotic suggestion, who knows? )

I'm not asking to go to therapy! I'm asking so I can do this on my own!

[The last thing he wanted was to bother someone about it, even if he knew that was their job.]

( oh boy... )

Well, that's an option, though not one I'd recommend. Exposing yourself to something traumatic can mean revisiting old wounds and we're not always the best judges of how well we can handle something like that.

( whether that's overdoing it or avoiding it completely. )

By having a neutral party on hand, you have someone who can monitor the situation and provide a second opinion or talk you through your feelings.

( sry, dude, he didn't go through a whole load of schooling to tell you to do it yourself. )

I've already been forcibly exposed to our team mascot because Kuroko thought it was funny in the beginning. Trust me, I've already had to get used the runt, so I know it's... possible.

Nova is just a different beast entirely, so that's why I'm asking.

( g r i m a c e. )

Well, since you insist on doing it yourself, I would recommend taking your time, at first only interacting with Nova when they're on a lead and in an area you feel safe. Take time afterwards to reflect on the encounter — how you felt, what interactions made you feel more or less nervous, and so on. It might help if you write all of this in a journal.

Of course, if you ever want to talk about anything, I'm more than happy to lend an ear.

I'm so sorry Kagamicchi! D:
I can keep Nova outside of the house for most of the day if that's better for you?
I just don't wanna leave him there during the night ;;

Shut it, Kise. It's fine.
He can stay in the house, just... maybe keep him in the guest room or something. I dunno.

Have you tried watching funny videos with that animal?
Or memes?

[ This might be the equivalent of "imagine people in the audience are naked whenever you're giving a speech". ]

[because of course Akira would suggest something like this.]

I'm not sure memes are gonna work, dude. Even if they are funny.

What kind of animal are we talking here, anyway?

[ Getting his meme folder ready. ]

Dogs.

attachment.jpg
Look at the picture and tell me what do you feel.

[ Now it's turning into some therapy via texts?? It looks like he has some kind of a plan, though. ]

[Of course, there's the initial panic. But then, when he realizes it was just a picture. He just rolled his eyes.]

Pictures don't make it any better. Why's it got wings?

Because he's got style.

[ To be honest, he doesn't even know. ]

I guess I could technically turn into a dog and we'll see how that goes.

[ Thanks, animal magic!! ]

I am of the belief one never truly escapes the fear entirely, but you can grow to tolerate it.

Is that what you are attempting?

Yeah, basically. Never gonna be a dog person, but it'd be nice to be able to tolerate them these days.

Understandable, if it is something as commonly encountered as dogs.

I have found that phobias are more tolerable when you encounter them with someone you trust. A friend who can distract you.

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