image+text; < thearchitect >

[emet_sulk]

[ Sometime during the month, an image is uploaded (the infamous LONG BREAD), accompanied by the following caption: ]

Assist me in proving a point to my unrepentant friend: this is not how one slices bread.

Comments

[angel_of_death]

There's no rule saying you have to. It is merely what I would do.

[He's in full butler mode right now.]

[emet_sulk]

[ Siiiiiigh. He's a big believer in conserving energy for important matters. Making finger sandwiches sure isn't one of them. Not if he has to go out of his way to buy more filling for them anyway. ]

If you like, I can give it to you instead. I have not touched it.

[angel_of_death]

[An offer of free food, you say. To a teenager, you say.]

I'll take it.

[It will be the perfect accompaniment to his tea.]

[emet_sulk]

Wonderful. Our room is-- [ Insert room number here. ]

Text -> Action

[angel_of_death]

I'll be there shortly.

[Guess who's showing up just a couple of minutes later? That's right. It's a hungry teenager.

Knock knock.]

chips was too late, i warned them

[weenwoon]

[Unfortunately for Emet, Hythlodaeus was closer to the door, so he gets to open it instead! Walter is greeted by a tall man with long white hair, an amiable smile and... a mask?]

Hello?

[angel_of_death]

[Well, that certainly is a tall man.

A very tall man. But Walter is undeterred by the curiosity of such a being. Upper body leaning back to match the masked man's approximate gaze, the young butler gets straight to the point.]

Hello. I'm here for the bread.

[weenwoon]

[He laughs, though there's a hint of wistfulness in it. Oh well, his creation might at least serve a purpose now!]

Ah, the one Emet-Selch offered it to! Do come in. I would love to have someone to dine with, seeing as my friend now borderline refuses to share a table with me.

[He opens the door wider and moves aside, gesturing for Walter to come in.]

[angel_of_death]

He only offered the bread, not anything to go with it.

[Walter hadn't planned on imposing to the extent of having a meal in the man's room. He has plenty of fillings to work with in his own quarters. He simply needs another loaf of bread.

He steps inside anyway, as a matter of courtesy. Will the man show? Or is he so irritated with this friend of his that he's decided to hide away somewhere...]

[emet_sulk]

[ Emet-Selch is indeed inside, sitting on his bed and looking quite done with the situation. If one didn't know better, one would think he'd just lost a running race against his friend. ]

Ah, there you are. Hythlodaeus was just about to make a grilled cheese sandwich with your bread.

[weenwoon]

[Contrary to Emet-Selch's emet-sulky expression, Hythlodaeus's smile only grows wider.]

That I was. Are you certain you've no desire to join me for the meal? Ah, and forgive my manners--I don't believe we are acquainted. Hythlodaeus, at your service. My dear friend here is Emet-Selch.

[angel_of_death]

[A grilled cheese sandwich. Of that length. Walter visibly shifts back, eyeing Hythlodaeus as though he's compounded his sin.]

Mister Hythlodaeus... making a single cheese sandwich and applying heat to it by any other means aside from toasting will lead to nothing more than an unconscionable mess. It will be unwieldy. It will leak. There will be grease everywhere.

[He would rather go buy his own loaf of bread, thank you. He likes his clothing free of grease stains.]

[emet_sulk]

[ Rolling his eyes, Emet-Selch gestures to Walter and stares at his friend flatly. ]

See? If you won't listen to me, listen to someone else who is sensible.

[weenwoon]

[He just lets that roll right off him.]

Oh dear. You truly think so? I had quite high hopes for it! But I rather liked your suggestion of making finger sandwiches, too.

[angel_of_death]

[Stain crisis averted. For now. Who knows with this Hythlodaeus fellow.]

I can show you how it is done. That way, you can make good use of the rest of your loaf.

[Now that one side of the crust has been annihilated for those who would rather cut the other way, one might as well cut the whole loaf the long way and turn it all into smaller, crust-less sandwiches.]

What sort of fillings do you have to work with?

[emet_sulk]

[ Aaaand now Hyth is ignoring him. Emet-Selch sighs loudly and lets himself fall backwards on to his bed, draping an arm over his eyes. He points in the direction of their kitchenette. ]

You may check the coldbox. The...refrigerator I believe they call it here.

[ It's a mix of whatever fanciful things Hythlodaeus buys along with the basics such as butter and jam. It's comically easy to tell who bought what, actually. ]