image+text; < thearchitect >

[emet_sulk]

[ Sometime during the month, an image is uploaded (the infamous LONG BREAD), accompanied by the following caption: ]

Assist me in proving a point to my unrepentant friend: this is not how one slices bread.

Comments

[birdflipping]

👍

[He's got you dude... whether you know how to use emojis or not.]

[weenwoon]

Well, it appears we must needs be room-mates now. I am being escorted out of my previous lodgings as we speak.

[He is not being escorted out of anywhere.]

[birdflipping]

Damn. Guess I'd better kick my uncle out to make room.

[weenwoon]

Can I not simply be another uncle? With three of us, we might be able to rent a bigger space.

[birdflipping]

Actually, it'd be six. Maaaybe seven?

Hope you like kids.

[weenwoon]

[Unbeknownst to Nero, Hythlodaeus has to pause before replying, his smile growing sadder for a few moments. He remembers the little ones who would come by the Bureau sometimes, whether on their own or as part of their studies. It's a bittersweet thought nowadays.]

I love children. And look on the other bright side: my erstwhile friend does not know how to handle them in the slightest, so the chances of him coming by to grouse are all the slimmer for that!

[birdflipping]

[Let shitposting heal your sadness, Hythlodaeus.]

Perfect. You pass the test.

[weenwoon]

[He will! There are much worse coping mechanisms out there. Not calling anyone out in particular tho. As such. Not really. Mostly.]

Wonderful! Where do I go to meet my new loving family?

[birdflipping]

Here you go. 😊

[He attaches directions.

To... the nearest bakery? No, Nero does not actually live there.]

[weenwoon]

[Is this a game of one-upping each other now? Who knows. But Hythlodaeus will, in fact, head out to the bakery. And unless Nero is actually planning to meet him there, the response he gets is... a number of selfies of a white-haired masked man with various baked goods. He looks like he's having a very good time. One of them is him holding a loaf like a child. Good with kids, see?]

[birdflipping]

[Nero had zero intention of meeting some random guy for a joke, so he gets to laugh his ass off at those beautiful, beautiful selfies.]

What a cute bread baby. You should be proud!

no wait, should I be worried? You're not gonna slice that one too, are you???

[weenwoon]

I resent the allegation that I would do aught to my beautiful child. I shall treasure them 'til the end of my days and raise them as best I can.

[Hythlodaeus is devoted to his shitposts so it's entirely possible at one point Nero will have to confront Emet-Selch shrieking because he's the reason Emet has been having to travel with a stale loaf of bread Hythlodaeus refuses to throw out.]

[birdflipping]

[oh well, that's future Emet's problem!]

dude that's so beautiful and emotional........ think I'm gonna cry

[weenwoon]

Is there aught more wondrous in the world than the bond between parent and child? Hold not your tears back, my dude.

[birdflipping]

[Nero has a deadbeat dad, he does not know this mythical bond of which you speak.

But have some facetious emoji spam anyway:]

😭😭😭😭😭🍞

[weenwoon]

[OOCly it's genuinely very funny to have Hyth be friends with Vergil in another game and say family things at Nero in Avalon, ngl. also wowee I'm finally learning how to make emojis on PC]

🥰❤🍞❤🥖❤🥐❤🥰🥰

Though I know not your name, my dude, I am loaf to part ways with you. May this kinship we have forged never grow stale.

[birdflipping]

[pfft that's hilarious, also i'm glad this thread has blessed you with emoji knowledge]

It's Nero. Not to butter you up, but it's been fun, no matter which way you slice it

[not here]

[emet_sulk]

[ You're both unofficially BANNED >:( ]