1st guide [Video; un: paimon]

[notemergencyfood]

[Video turns on to this adorable child-like human; white hair with a floating tiara, black star pendant on hair, etc. Distress painted on her face, then she speaks.]

This is not a drill! Paimon repeats, this is not a drill! Paimon arrived recently and lost someone important. He's not here yet, but if you spot this person---

[Paimon holds up a drawing:



At least she spelled 'missing' in the right language, right?]

--Please contact your local Paimon for further instructions! Or give him Paimon's contact. Paimon misses the body pillow. That is all, thank you.

Does this place sell sticky honey roast anywhere?

Comments

[sefirot]

What is a troll?

[notemergencyfood]

Someone with mega long hair asking from stupid to useless questions, only to disturb the peace of the network. That's you, isn't it.

[sefirot]

Do you often call others names when you are incapable of answering questions?

[notemergencyfood]

Excuse you, the only one here who's barely to not answering at all is the six foot troll hair. It's Paimon's turn to ask questions. Who the HECK are you?!

[sefirot]

Me? I'm a god.

[notemergencyfood]

Huh? [Excuse her for a moment.] God of what exactly?

[sefirot]

The entire planet.

1/2

[notemergencyfood]

Ugh, that's a way whole a lot of responsibilities.

[Paimon, are you seriously believing this?]

[notemergencyfood]

So, all mighty God of the Planet? How does it feel to walk like a human?

[sefirot]

Like I'm still fully capable of exacting my wrath upon those who cross the line.

[notemergencyfood]

[Should she introduce Childe to him? HMMM.]

They should call you God of Out of my way, but that sounds too long anyway. [Then again, not a lot of Gods or Archons willing reveals themselves like this.] Nobody wants to worship a pushover, okay.

So, what does a God of the Planet do anyway?

[sefirot]

You could say I decide the future. Who lives. Who dies. The fate of everything in the palm of my hands.

[notemergencyfood]

You won't have many followers with that kind of decision.

[sefirot]

Who said I needed followers?