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video; un: poison

I don't suppose anyone will really be interested in hearing this--... [Poison doesn't say this with any bitterness. Perhaps Horus would be curious about it? But sometimes you learn something... and keeping it to yourself is just impossible.

The young woman shrugs.]

I've worried for years that I'm not the true version of myself. That the reason I keep being moved from world to world instead of going home is that the original version of me is already home... but I was able to summon Morganna a while ago, and she was able to show me the truth.

[She doesn't trust the Fae, but when it comes to bargaining with them... she does at least trust that they will respond to a simple question with a truthful answer. Poison had been careful in her dealings with Morganna, and she's sure that she wasn't misled.

What would have been the point?]

And I was wrong. Whatever the Technicians did to me back in that place, I'm still myself. And I know that it won't make much sense to anyone... maybe no one will even see why it's important, but I don't have many friends, and after everything I've been through I thought this was something worth... celebrating. Just a little. Even if it's only me celebrating it.

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I feel like I'm missing a bunch of context, but congrats! Wanna do something proper to celebrate? Besides just announcing it here, I mean.

Yeah... it's a long story and I don't think many people would enjoy hearing it. But the outcome is important to me, in the end.

[Except Claude, perhaps, because he does seem the type of person to be into hearing about other people just to sate his own curiosity. Either way, Poison already has him down as an all right sort of guy.]

Something... proper? What do you mean?

I don't know, what do you think is fun? I like to celebrate things with a big meal. But it's your thing, so you should do whatever you enjoy.

[She presses her lips together, looking strangely unsettled.]

I'm sure it would utterly shock you to hear that I've not really thought much about the things I find fun. At least, not for a while. [Poison makes a face.]

I like fishing... maybe I'll do that? When the sun is back.

[No, he isn't shocked, but he figures that's all the more reason she should do something.]

You know you can fish at night, right? It's not a thing you need the sun for.

I know you can fish at night, Claude. [Please, sir!]

But it isn't as enjoyable, and it can be more dangerous. I wouldn't like to be snuck up on by some fae creature while I was watching the water. Besides, this weird darkness is probably spooking the fish off anyway.

Let's celebrate then. I don't know who you are, or what it is you're speaking of. But if you want to celebrate, lets!

[It's actually nice that people are interested despite not knowing what the hell she's talking about. The usually stern-faced young woman can't help but smile.]

What would you normally do to celebrate something?

Normally I would go out and drink and eat. Like the answer before me suggested. But not just anything, I normally go for foods and beers that are more expensive than I'd normally get.

It's a celebration, after all. Part ot it is enjoying the best food you can find.

[She supposes there's some merit in the idea... Enough to not immediately dismiss it, anyway.]

I don't go out to eat very often. I don't suppose you know where might be good in the town?

A few places. There's a place that mainly specializes in Flemmish foods that's really good. Another one that's run by an acquaintance of mine called fortune panda or something or other. I can always vouch for his cooking as well.

Hm... then there's more local bars and restaurants downtown. It really depends on your tastes.

I tend to like simple food, I wasn't brought up on rich meals or anything... unusual. [And these days, being unused to them, they just upset her stomach.]

What is 'Flemmish'?

Low Countries in Europe, I think you might refer to them as the Dutch as well.

But I'm also never certain how familiar people are with Earth.

[A shrug of his massive shoulders follows.]

Oh. Earth. I'm not from there.

[But thankfully she knows about it, because asking questions was starting to make her feel awkward.]

I'm from a different place. We don't have 'Europe' or anything like that. I've never even seen a map of what the world looks like.

Mm figured that would be the case.

[She's not the only one, after all. But you never know what someone knows until after they're asked.]

Well that's fine, if simple is more your style both places can do that. Depending on what sounds good to you.

[Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to indulge a little. This is really the best she's felt in a long time, knowing that she isn't stuck out here bouncing between strange worlds for the rest of her life.]

What is Flemmish food like? Can you describe it to me?

From what I know of it, Flemish foods tend to have a lot of sweets and stews. I don't know much beyond what the place serves, and what it serves tends to be very filling. I would recommend the beef stew that's been cooked in their beer if that's where you'd like to go.

They also have plenty of sweets and pastries if that's more of your thing.

In beer? Is it alcoholic?

[Sorry about her, she has no experience with cooking with beers or wines. A stew being able to get you drunk sounds really strange, though.]

It sounds like you have some experience with their cuisine... do you like it? [Or maybe just the stew?]

That you're the true version of you...that you're still yourself, huh?

[Mukuro seemed quite thoughtful as she thought over this post- she vaguely remembered this person, maybe from the masquerade last year?]

You don't really know me but congrats- that kinda stuff's gotta be a total pain to figure out. But it's totally important.

Oh, thank you...

[It's nice that a few people are taking notice. More than she would have expected, even while she was putting it out there.]

It's been bothering me for a long time. This is the fourth place I've been to that wasn't home. Just knowing that there is still somewhere waiting for me to go back to is... [Just for a moment, her voice catches. She takes a deep breath.]

It's so good to know.

[That pause caught Mukuro's attention- she felt she should say something, but wasn't entirely sure what. Emotional intelligence was far from her strong point.]

...Yeah, it must be. Seriously, bouncing between four worlds like that's gotta be a major headache.

But! Yeah! To have somewhere to go back to's a good thing~

[In fairness, it isn't really Poison's strong point either. Gentle discussions like that aren't things she's very good at, so maybe it's better that Mukuro doesn't say anything after all.]

Yeah. It's been a few years now, but at least it's something.

[The young woman sighs.]

I don't know if I'll regret forgetting everything or not. That does seem to be how it works, doesn't it - you go home, and you forget.

...Wait, what? You forget everything when you go back?

[Come to think of it- apparently she'd been in another world before this, but couldn't remember. Was that normal?]

But you can remember the other worlds you've been in, right? Why would it all like, go away when you go home?

I don't know, but it's always seemed to be that way... Everywhere I've been before. [Poison shrugs, sighs... It's just how it is and she'd like to say she'd grown used to it, but it really is just one of those things you don't get used to.]

People go home and sometimes they come back and don't even remember having been there before. Or they remember when they show up again, but they didn't when they were back home. So... I assume I'm not going to remember anything either.

That's so weird...but I guess memories really can just disappear, huh?

[It stung more than she wanted to admit. She didn't want to be forgotten, or to have the precious memories stolen away from her. She'd seen how easy that was back home, after all...

Still, she at least had enough awareness to realise that it wasn't really appropriate to bring out her 'dull, dismal' manner on a celebratory post like this.]

But anyway- sorry, I didn't mean to drag whether you forget it or not, you know you're going to go right back to where you came from when it's all done here- that's what's important!

It's okay, it's not a weird thing to worry about and I guess I've seen more of it than most people here.

[And she'd like to say you get used to it, but you really don't. It might sting a little bit less every time, but it still stings. Though she's not going to say no to a change in topic and takes the diversion gladly.]

But... yeah, it's important. I've always figured I wouldn't because of some things that happened in the first world I was in. [She smiles a bit, the expression softening her sharp features.] Maybe this won't be over yet, or soon, but some day.

Yeah...sounds like you've bounced around a lot. Was the first world you were in really that bad? Was it a kinda save the worlds thing like this one was?

[They certainly wouldn't be leaving until they'd dealt with saving this one, anyway.]

The first one--...

[Oh, she doesn't like to talk about the first one. That is clear enough with the way her expression subtly contorts.]

In the first one... we were being killed over and over to feed some kind of old god and keep it from waking up. I don't think it was for any other worlds. Just that one.

...Okay, that's kinda fucked up.

[Mukuro pulled a face at that- it made her glad that Avalon had been a fairly tame world, in comparison.]

Imagine having to live it. And having to remember it.

[There's a reason that Poison is the way she is. Closed off, reserved, prone to occasional outbursts of temper... That she came through it all with her sanity intact is a testament to her resolve.]

I died four times, and I still have nightmares about it.

Yeah... I've only died once and that- that- took a while to get my head around.

[She couldn't remember her second death after all. Four times, though...that was a lot.]

It doesn't get easier to deal with it.

[Poison rubs the back of her neck with a small frown. It's hard, still being able to remember all of that even now, but she thinks that all the loss from the amount of times her friends have disappeared is worse.]

But sometimes knowing other people understand how it feels can help, even if you'd rather that no one else had to understand it.

Agreed. Even if it seems senseless, someone might understand it.

[...She was dragging the conversation down again, wasn't she? Mukuro couldn't help a frown come into her face. She really was a dull, dismal girl at heart, wasn't she?]

Sorry...sorry, I'm really bad at this...

[Perhaps unexpectedly, Poison lets out a little laugh.]

It's fine. I started it, didn't I?

[She didn't have to bring up the whole being killed over and over thing, and yet!] I try not to bring it up all the time but it's... I don't know. It's a big part of who I am now, if that makes sense.

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