avalononline | 001: Audio

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001: Audio | un: Graywords

[Unlike everyone who isn't an asocial loner, Zelgadis prefers to keep his face off the network. He doesn't even really want to address the network at all, but he's kind of reached a point where keeping to himself isn't really working out. Sooo this is him stepping outside his comfort bubble, good for him.

Well, kind of stepping out of it. He just goes ahead and skips a proper introduction completely in order to get down to business.]

You'll have to forgive me if this seems like a stupid question, but the sort of technology that you have here doesn't exist where I'm from. To say that everything feels overwhelming is an understatement, but before I get too off track...

[There's a deep sigh, the sigh of a man who is just So Done with all the ridiculous curveballs that life keeps throwing at him.] This... microwave device, I believe is what it's called. It's not supposed to be smoking, right?

[Maybe he should have asked someone for technology tips before almost setting his hotel room on fire. Sorry about the smoke, hotel.]

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Sorry to hear that.

[And he is. It sounds like Darin's family situation is probably just as shitty as his is.]

Since Rezo was helping people with his miracles and such, some companions of mine and I... Well, we didn't necessarily do Rezo's dirty work, but say a village was robbed by bandits, we were the ones to take care of it. I just wasn't very strong, it didn't seem to matter how much time or effort I put into training. One day, Rezo took it upon himself to help me get stronger, and he turned me into this.

[another pause, though this time it's less for dramatic effect and more because Zel is staring at his hands while recalling this serious bullshit.]

At first, I tried to just accept it. I'd technically gotten what I wanted, and my companions were supportive. I thought maybe everything would be okay, but then I discovered that Rezo was just using me as an experiment in his search for a cure for his blindness. I wasn't the only one, either. Everything that he'd ever done had an ulterior motive. Everything.

[Darin makes a nondescript sound, his features unreadable. He knows all about being used, a pawn in some game you had no stake in. It's really unclear who got the worse hand out of the two of them, but at least Darin could empathize.]

This is one of the reasons I have a problem with the clergy. It's really easy to hide behind a sanctimonious front and even easier to sweep your cruelty under the rug of 'being ordained by a higher power.'

[Darin didn't really even know if priests were the same in Zel's world as they were in his, but this Rezo clown seemed to fit every misgiving he'd ever had about the church.]

...So, what did you do then?

[Zel huffs again, nodding his head in agreement. Everyone had thought Rezo was some great sage, someone who could do no wrong, but Zelgadis knew better.]

I turned on him, of course, though the details of that are... yet another long story. The extremely short version is that we killed him twice -- well. Technically three times if you count the clone.

...I just realized how insane my life sounds.

Pft.

Sounds pretty cut and dry to me. Bet I can top it.

Please top it. I want you to top it.

[Darin reels in one of the lines to check it then nonchalantly casts the line once more.]

I was born to end the world.

[The end thanks for coming to my Ted Talk]

[Zelgadis checks the other line, since its would be rude to make Darin do all the work.

Uh but then he pauses because Darin just said some SHIT.]

...Well okay, then. I think that means you win.

Hah! Told ya!

Man, I shoulda bet you some gold on that one.

[Like...that's it. He doesn't seem to be going into detail. How is he going to end the world? By being stupid at it?]

[Zel would definitely accept that as an answer.

...but no, he actually is curious about this.]

Does it have something to do with that demon you mentioned? Or would you rather not talk about it?

[HONESTLY he'd be fine with that, he doesn't want to be too nosy.]

Nah, it's fine. No sense hiding it now.

On my world, there was a war between Archfiends and Celestials. Short version? It was prophesied that the world of man was going to come to end at a certain date in the future. Turns out Diomuhr, the Lord of all Archfiends, forced his own reincarnation into twin boys. My brother Dromas and me. Supposedly, he and I are meant to bring about the end of our world.

But spoilers, Celestials caught wind of the plan. There was some in-fighting or something, I'm not sure, but the end result was my father, my brother, and myself were cut down when Dromas and I were five. I barely survived, my brother took the blow for me and got cut in half for it. I only survived because of the resilience gifted to me by my tainted blood.

[He sighs.]

My mom died giving birth to Dromas and I so I was orphaned in the attack. But that sure wasn't the end of it.

That's... that's terrible.

[Like literally all of that? Pretty terrible, bro.]

Forgive me if I'm prying too much, but it sounds like without the both of you, this 'end of the world' prophesy can no longer be fulfilled, right?

You'd think that.

Except the Archfiends had different plans. They took Dromas' soul. Taught him how to use our powers. Then resurrected him. He's back now and he's wreaking havoc on my world. He framed me for murder to get me to chase him across the country.

He's determined to fulfill the prophecy...

Ah. I can see how that would be a problem.

...Well, I suppose the silver lining is the fact that apparently our worlds are currently frozen in time right now? Maybe this will give you a chance to come up with some sort of plan.

[look at him, looking on the bright side for once!]

Screw that noise, I'm never going back to my world.

Not my problem.

...Or I guess that works too.

[Hey remember those fishing lines WELL one of the poles suddenly gets yanked out of place by probably a fish. Instinctively Zelgadis jumps up and leaps after the fishing pole, HEY DARIN THE FISH ARE BITING.]

[BET YOU THOUGHT THIS CLOWN WAS SOME KINDA HERO IN THE MAKING, HUH ZEL]

Whoa hey! Alright! [Darin dives forward and manages to catch the pole...halfway out into the water.]

[He hits the bank, his legs on dry land and his upper half? Well, it's underwater. But Darin, undeterred, starts to yank back on the line while kicking his feet, indicating that maybe Zel should grab his ankles.]

[It's fine, Zelgadis is more than used to dealing with this kind of Loony Toons bullshit, but it doesn't annoy him any less. He grabs Darin's stupid ankles, but now that he doesn't have all that super cool chimera strength that he had back home, he struggles a bit to pull him back out of the water. He manages to keep him from like, drowning, but slips and falls on his ass in the process. Great, what a cool day he's having.]

[One last tug and Darin seems to have landed the fish, a big, burly trout that flops on the grass as Darin pulls himself up. He shakes himself dry like a big, stupid dog and looks at the fish, then proclaims.]

Whoo! Yeah! It's a whopper alright! I knew this spot would be good!

[GOOD JOB DARIN. Zelgadis snatches that fish up by the tail and holds a hand out to help Darin up because he's nice that way.]

Good call. Come on, I'll get a fire going and you can get dried off.

[AND they can cook a fish, everybody wins.]

Alright, let me just gut this guy too.

[Darin sets about gutting the fish right there on the spot with his handy-dandy pocket knife. Once that's done, he hands over the fish to Zel to prep while he shrugs off his sleeveless coat and black shirt underneath.]

[Don't mind that hideous looking scar across his back. It's from when he almost died as a kid.]

[He could start the fire the old fashioned way but also he has some fancy new magics to keep practicing. He sets up a nice little cooking area and conjures a small flame, taking the fish from Darin skewering them fuckers right up. He gets them set up over the fire and glances over Darin's way. LIKE it would be kind of rude to just be like YO NASTY SCAR BRO, right?

I mean fuck manners.]

How'd you get that? [I mean he can probably guess but hey]

Hm? Oh this?

I got it when I was five. When my brother and father were killed. See, I turned to run and my brother got in the way. He got cut completely in half.

I just got mostly cut in half.

My God. I get that you're not exactly human, but it's still a wonder that you were able to survive something like that.

Yeah, well...I wasn't awake for most of the healing process. But I figure if I'm half of some god, he probably didn't want me biting it before I could fulfill his stupid plans.

[Darin takes a seat by the fire to help dry off and warm up.]

...you said you've had experience with demon lords. Anything to do with that priest relative of yours?

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