avalononline | {3rd Seal; voice}

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{3rd Seal; voice}

I've.....had...well. A lot. A lot explained to me about things back home since I got here. I'm just, I guess, wondering if that's happened to others too. That they don't remember as much as others from home that have shown up? How you have dealt with it? In my case....basically everything I was told since I can remember, it's all been lies. Not that I think everyone meant to, just that the truth of it all happened so long ago and they didn't know the real reasons behind the Chosen's Journey. I guess I'm still figuring it. How to feel. How to deal with knowing, now.

[Colette's had a little time now but it isn't something that she will adjust to overnight. Something that will be forgiven and understood so easily, for all that she generally is a forgiving doormat type considering her issues regarding her self-esteem because of the Chosen system she was brought up with. She takes a moment, a sigh being heard before one could possibly almost imagine and see the small smile at her lips as she tries to change topic to something lighter.]

Ah, but. I've been thinking too! About what I want to do here? What I can do to help out somehow at least. I was thinking.....um. Dogs! Maybe, like the bunny cafes? Or something like helping take people's dogs for walks or looking after them when someone goes out on a quest or something? Maybe? Either that or perhaps something with plants. Since I have that magic - Green magic. I'm still learning, but. Maybe that might be another option. To make use of these abilities here. If someone needs help with their plants, their flowers. I probably should try help out more, find work, somewhere else besides the inn to stay.

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[It's all been lies? Ooooh no...]

If you want, you know you can be upset about it. Also, if you wanna meet somewhere and talk about it... or just sit and not think about it alone, we can do that.

[He doesn't have much input on the dogs thing... or plants.]

[Lies. Everything is lies, Zidane.]

I -- you would? It wouldn't be....?

[A burden? She wouldn't be upsetting him? Maybe she shouldn't have mentioned. Shouldn't have asked. But it's out there now. All she can do is try move on now. Whatever that means for her in processing it all, that Kratos confided in her in explaining. Colette seems uncertain, not wanting to worry him or anything. Still having that instinctive desire to keep things in, to not open up when doing so might upset everyone.]

Nah, it wouldn't be any problem.

[Normally, he'd be fine with leaving a friend be to figure things out, but Colette, she struck him as the type that might need a friend nearby. But... maybe that's him thinking he should hover nearby just in case she needs a hand.]

O-okay. Alright. Just let me know when and where you wanted to meet.

[She could be there. Maybe talking about it or getting distracted would help. Or something. She won't know until she tries, either way? Right? So Colette gives a nod, before remembering he can't actually see her.]

I'm just at the inn in my room for now.

Well, it's a pretty nice day out today. And there's a park pretty close to the Inn; let's meet there in maybe thirty minutes?

[He's out and about himself right now, but he can change directions.]

By the way, you got a favorite snack?

Alright. I can meet there. Snacks? Ah, well. I like fruits? Or cookies!

[She does have something of a sweet tooth. It shows in her ingredients she uses in her cooking dishes. Colette wouldn't deny that. She assumes he means to take the time along the way to stop and get them something to eat. It was something she still had to remind herself on, or more accurately, her stomach's grumbling and protesting reminded her to eat again. Her body still sometimes konking out from her not being used to sleeping. She's getting better about it, more in the habit but there are still some occasions she needs her body to remind her given her situation back home.]

Okay! See you in a bit!

[He has to make a brief stop by the bakery. Maybe there was a fruity cookie, or should he get like a fruit tart? Did he have enough for both? He'd see once he got there and saw the prices.]

[She waits a little, since he said to meet in a half hour, before she heads off to figure getting to the park from the inn. It doesn't take her long, before she makes it there and spots him, quickly approaching and thankfully not actually tripping over as she makes her way to him. She just hopes he wasn't waiting too long but he said he was out at the time so probably needed that time to get here from wherever he was.]

Zidane! Ah, you weren't waiting too long?

[He's been waiting for a bit thinking that he might be late - and that'd be terrible after offering to meet her. He's been watching people in the meantime, a surprise hidden behind his back that hopefully she hasn't seen when he perks up at her call.]

Nah, I got here a minute ago. You're right on time!

That...sounds like it's a lot to process. Are you going to be all right?

Edited 2021-05-02 12:33 (UTC)

[Hmmm...]

I think the better question is are you going to be okay? I know it's not easy to process how you've been told lies.

[...Hm. In some ways he can relate a little to what she's saying, and he is a bit concerned for her well-being.]

...Colette, it's Eustace. There's something I'd like to show you that might help with what you want to do.

[Rather than asking the usual questions, he's going to try and cheer her up in his own way.]

[ And here is another post that Emil needs a strong cup of coffee to deal with. He'd suspected it was coming after Kratos pulled her aside the last time... but that doesn't make it easier to hear.

Emil leans back, closing his eyes. All he'd told Colette so far was that he was from Luin, after the world was saved, and he traveled with her and Lloyd for a time. (Oh, and that he was a monster tamer... which also wasn't a lie, just not the whole truth.) It was the most he was willing to say at the time. Maybe he should feel more guilty that he pushed the bulk of it onto Kratos. (No, Ratatosk insists, that responsibility was for the seraphim, not us.)

It's still several minutes before he's ready, and then Emil's voice is gentle over the speakers. ]

I just rented a cottage on the outskirts of the city. I haven’t had the chance to finish cleaning yet, and it's overgrown with vines. I could use some help, if you want to come over?

[ He doesn't really need help clearing plants but! It's the most innocuous invitation that Emil can think of. ]

[Who has two thumbs and feels like a giant piece of shit IIIIT'S THIS GUY.

Kratos refrains from commenting, as he assumes that Colette will seek him out whenever she's ready to talk to him. Hell, maybe she'll never be ready to talk to him again. That would certainly make dealing with this easier for him, but he knows that she's not the kind of person to just write people off no matter how shitty they are.

So, as he has no idea how to approach this subject without potentially making it worse, he'll just keep his mouth shut and keep his phone on him, should she feel like contacting him.]

[All of it had been lies...? For some reason, Izuku had that sort of feeling in the pit of his stomach before. That there was just something not right or not clicking about Colette's story. He had tried to ask but maybe he didn't get the questions right or she hadn't known the truth back then. His stomach sinks...]

Colette-san... T-That seems like a lot to learn about. If- If you need someone to talk to about it... Sometimes it's better to try and talk out how you're feeling. If you w-want to. You told me before that Lloyd and the others were able to save you, that you didn't have to sacrifice your feelings as a human before so...

[Just what about her journey was a lie?]

Ah, good! You said a half hour, is all.

[Colette's oblivious to him hiding something, as she simply approaches and brushes some hair behind her ear, behind her back. She's not sure yet on if talking about it all might help or simply letting him help distract her from it all. How to even begin, really. Most everyone else here has no idea, only basics on what she might have mentioned and even then now that's all lies, about things back home. Things she always took for granted. Things she was taught as fact, about the Journey. About Mithos and the -- well. She wasn't really a Goddess, apparently. Martel. Her smile shifts, falling but only slightly, for a moment.]

It is good to be out though. I saw two dogs on the way here!

[....of course Colette's highlight so far leaving her room was the dogs. Of course it was.]

Eventually? Once I process it all. It's just....a lot. To hear that everything I thought I knew, everything I was taught. The real reason of what I was expected to do, my real duty was a lie.

[Even this is a lot. For her to come out and admit. When Colette usually bottles things up in not wanting to worry others. Which in and of itself with this post says how much this is affecting her, for all that she generally tries to keep a smile going.]

It's....a lot. I guess you probably are one of those I've talked to more about things back home. I know things seem to have worked out in the end, but. Getting to that point.

[There's so much. So much she took for granted as the truth that really wasn't. At all. Or things that were half truth but not the whole story. It's all twisted, to suit Mithos' needs. His desire to reunite with his sister. Going as far as to have so many previous Chosen sacrifice themselves in the attempt, in attempt to find someone compatible to be Martel's vessel. To find Colette.

She switches to attempt to private the conversation. To filter it.]

There's more. To the Journey. The real reason they have the Chosen system. It's not just to try Regenerate the world for the mana supply and deal with the Desians. They wanted to find someone with the right mana signature to become a vessel for Martel. That's why. Why in the process of the Journey, the Chosen loses their humanity.

I will be? Eventually. I think it's just going to take time. To process it all.

[The lies. All the implications of it, what Kratos had told her about things back home. Colette is not sure how many here would really understand, given there's only three from home here, but still. That she is asking, even that says a lot given how she usually would bottle things up to avoid worrying everyone.]

The things I was lied to about were so long ago. Almost more like half truths but not the whole story. Because of how long ago it was, because things got twisted over time and I guess, they didn't want us to know the truth about the Chosen system because it would mean we would be less likely to go through with it? With going on the Journey.

[As if anyone would willing want to go lose their humanity and become a vessel for someone's sister they lost thousands of years ago. As if losing their humanity itself wasn't awful enough, painful enough to endure.]

Eustace? Ah, something you want to show me?

[That might help? She isn't sure what to expect from this but she may as well meet him and see?]

Mm. Where are you now?

Yup, I did! You're right on time, really.

[It's not a conversation that's easy to start at all, but he waits to see if she wanted to talk about it herself without prompting... or if she wanted to distract herself. Either option was fine to him really. What she says though, he isn't surprised she doesn't want to get into it. No one wants to talk about their life practically being a lie...]

Two dogs? Big ones or small? Oh, or was there one big and one small dog?

Ah? A cottage? I can come help! Sure.

[It's something. Something to do. To keep her busy. A chance to see him again. After all, he remembers her from home. There's just the three of them so they should stick together, as Zelos would say, right? Or something like that. Colette couldn't say no to the idea of helping him get his new place in order together. Then again he's probably anticipating that given how Colette befriends pretty much everyone including Sheena. The ninja sent to assassinate her and all.]

Just let me know when and directions.

[Maybe she should blame him more. But she doesn't. Kratos himself wasn't the one that started it all. From what he'd said, it was Mithos. Mithos the supposed hero, and everything that resulted from him losing his sister. Martel. Not the Goddess as she has been taught, apparently. That would take some time, if ever she really accepts that, given Colette's faith and connection with the church because of her status as the Chosen.

Still. She does eventually, a little after the message on the phones, get to messaging him.]

I guess I'm still processing it all. What you've told me. About the Journey. About Mithos and Martel. It's just a lot. I'm sure I'll eventually learn to accept it and deal with it. For now though. I'm still working on that.

Not that I blame you. And at least you told me now. So now I know the truth. So thank you.

[There were a lot of things Ken didn't quite understand. He didn't know what this Chosen system was or why there was a need to lie about it. However, regardless if how much he knew, there was one thing that he did.]

Mind if I ask exactly what this Journey is? Only if you're okay with telling me.

[He knew what it was like to be lied to. It wasn't easy nor was it something that anyone should go through. All he could do was to offer her some comfort.]

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{3rd Seal; voice}

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Voice; un: Koromaru

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Not here, because Kratos is an idiot.

voice; un; deku

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no subject

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Kratos plz.

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